RICH AND A KING (PART 1)! One was Richand one was a King. They churned remarkable columns: // link // print // previous // next //
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2008
Team of hacks/hes a Jet all the way: We had to chuckle when Brokaws angels began inventing Saint McCains legacy. The Parson, Jon Meacham, was first to cleared his throat and opine. Forgive his failure to form complete thoughts. Just note the odd shape of his reasoning:
If it isnt silly, Meacham wont say it. No, Obamas stepfather teaching him how to box wasnt the main thing he remembered from growing up in Indonesia. And the Parson was of course required to say that he himself had been very skepticalas a Southerner, of courseat the idea that a black guy could get elected. But note the logic the Parson employed when evaluating McCain. His campaign could have been a lot worse, Meacham said. Therefore, the campaign had been noble.
No real human reasons that way. Thats the logic of the fabulists employed to shape the conceptual world of your Potemkin democracy. Theyre introduced as analysts and historiansbut, in fact, theyre serial novelists. Once their characters have been defined, nothingnothing!will ever change the way theyve been sketched out.
Mightily pleased by what Meacham had said, Brokaw turned to Doris Kearns Goodwin. The pair extended the tale:
I was just going to spout, Goodwin said, in a rare moment of candor.
The shape of the ongoing novel was clear. In fact, defeated candidates always give gracious speechesin our view, McCain was a bit more grumpy than mostbut this one was used to extend a key portrait. Somewhat comically, Goodwin described what McCain was beforebefore he paraded about the country, making absurd claims about Obama the Socialist while his running-mate, Sarah the McCarthyite, talked about the way Obama liked to pal around with terrorists. But in the Parson and the Plagiarists novel, this conduct has quickly been wished away. In their novel, McCain is so noble and so gracioushis classy speech was so extraordinarythat Obama would be a fool if he didnt let McCain run the federal government. Sorryhold some big position.
Were told that we should be proud of our country. Sorry, we arent buying any part of the concept. In fact, you dont really have a country when its discourseits collective memoryis incessantly shaped by the Team of Hacks which ran on the field Sunday morning.
Do you really have a country? Or is your country a holograma dream-scape invented by a pseudo-elite? Well discuss the question all week. But in todays hackneyed piece by the Kaiser, another historian uses the term collective memory to describe what we were given last week (for a previous use of the term, see THE DAILY HOWLER, 11/7/08). Unfortunately, this country has many collective memories of the past twenty yearscollective memories of seminal events which never actually occurred. Your neighbors were handed these memories by the hacks Coach Brokaw dragged out on the field.
They introduce themselves as historians; in truth, they write novelsdime novels. In the novel extended above, McCain must, by law, remain noble. As a group, they devoted the best years of their lives to creating this childish portraita portrait they invented at the same time they invented Al Gore, the Big Liar. For reasons only they can explain, they insisted on jamming these ludicrous portraits into your countrys collective memory. And under the rules of their childish game, Saint McCain must remain a great saint:
When youre a Jet, youre a Jet all the way in the land of these kaisers and parsons.
No, that isnt the main thing Obama remembered from growing up in Indonesia. But these hacks have stories theyre determined to tell; fact and logic are tossed away in the face of that driving imperative. If a campaign could have been worse, that demonstrates that the campaign was noble! And this is the way group memory is formed on your nations most prestigious news program!
Given that, how proud are you of your country? Are you sure that your country exists?
Shipps shapes: Long ago, E.R. Shipp, then Post ombudsman, described the way the Post seemed to be defining the roles of various actors in an unfolding political dramaan unfolding political novel otherwise known as Campaign 2000. Right as rain thenstill right today! More than eight years ago, Shipp described the way a Team of Hacks was inventing a saint named McCain:
Shipp described the work of the Posts reporter-dramatists, who had assigned different roles to the actors. In the process, she pre-described yesterdays Meet the Press.
PART 1RICHLY EMBELLISHED: What can you say about a country where a guy like Frank Rich helps establish the discourse? Helps create the collective memories? In his typical New York Times column, Rich presents some sort of strange novel. But on Sunday, our second double-take occurred during just his third paragraph. Well review our first double-take by the end of the week. But Frankly, we thought this was Rich:
Really? Few Democrats believed that Americans would ever...elect a black man named Barack Hussein Obama president? If thats true, who were the 18 million people who voted for Obama during the primaries? Who were all the industrious, caring people who worked and organized for him?
As usual, Rich is heightening drama (lying/writing a novel) when he makes this ludicrous statement. Were told to be proud of our country this weekby Brother Krugman, to a lesser extent by Kathleen Parker. But what does it mean when a countrys elites put phantasmagorists in charge of its discourse?
Rich said he was speaking bluntly in this part of his column. Almost every assumption of our political culture was proved wrong Tuesday night, he said. But as he proceeded to list those assumptions, the gentleman rarely missed the chance to embellish, misstate, play the fool with his data. That said, the analysts really came out of their chairs when they reached the pronouncement which follows. Rich is blatantly making this up. What does it mean when your countrys elites let you be talked to this way?
Really? After Palin debuted at the Republican Convention, the punditocracy was nearly uniform in declaring her selection a brilliant coup? The rave reviews only ceased after polls confirmed that she was costing McCain votes? Simply put, these claims are utterly bogus, like so much of the work Rich types. So what does it mean when a guy like this helps define what Americans know?
Out here in the actual world, how did the punditocracy react to Palins debut in St. Paul ? The lady spoke in St. Paul on Wednesday, September 3. Tomorrow, well give you a sample of what was being said that weekend, starting on Friday, September 5. Well look in four of our biggest newspapersincluding the paper employing Frank Rich. Youll see why our analysts leaped from their chairs when they scanned the grandees strange pronouncement.
A great deal of remarkable work appeared in our newspapers over the weekend. We were struck by Richand frankly, we were almost rendered nauseous when we fact-checked the work of a King.