PLANET OF THE CHIMPS! Your journalism just got dumber. In the process, the chimps have switched sides: // link // print // previous // next //
FRIDAY, AUGUST 22, 2008
GEORGE F. WILL, SLOW LEARNER: Is there any other subject where so many know-nothings pose as experts? Yesterday, George F. Will displayed his vast brilliance about the state of elementary ed. In the following part of his column, Will is discussing Benjamin Chavis, who runs a well-known public charter school in Oakland:
That highlighted statement is simply astounding. And trust us: Will knows as much about this subject as you know about the space shuttle program. We know how to close the achievement gap! Its amazingly easy to sayand many hustlers now constantly say it. For all we know, Will may be channeling Wendy Kopp, well-known biggest hack in the land.
Sorry, but nowe dont know how to close the achievement gap at this time. When people parade about saying we do, they commit an unfortunate act. But then, every dumb-ass on earth seems to say this nowoften on the flimsiest evidence. In large part, Will seems to be basing his uplifting claim on the high test scores at Chavis school (the misleadingly-named American Indian Public Charter School, which kids of all races and ethnicities). Many kids have achieved great success at the school. But does that mean we know how to achieve such success as a general matter? Will seems willing to say it does. But right at the start of his column, this know-nothing know-it-all dumbly describes one part of this schools success:
We often deride slow-learner students. But could anyone show less capacity for learning than George F. Will, right in this piece?
Why does Chavis school send so many students to Hopkins? Duh. In part, because it picks and chooses the kids who attend! The 13-year-old whom Will describes is already doing well at school, we seem to be told. Not only that: Hes so motivated that hes paying another student to tutor himand hes already purchased the uniform of a school which wont let him in! Well applaud that student, just as Will does. But if Will would only submit to paid tutoring, even if he could probably see that public schools, as a general matter, dont select their students this way. The average school must accept all the kids who arrivenot just the brightest, most determined students, the ones who refuse to go away.
Friends, for just $5 a month, you can provides books and equipment for Will. Wont you consider making that small donation to give him the help he deserves?
PLANET OF THE CHIMPS: A massive change in our political journalism can be seen in this mornings Washington Post. Houses Add Up to A Snag for McCain,says the headline on Jonathan Weismans report, right at the top of the papers front page. In recent weeks, Weismans work has been grindingly badand its bad again today. Instantly, Weisman starts playing the chimpand displaying that change in our journalism. This is his opening paragraph:
Weisman may be right about the jeopardy to McCains strategy. But is he right on his most basic facts? With his first breath, Weisman asserts that McCain couldnt recall the number of homes he owns. Yes, thats the scriptand Weisman types it. But for ourselves, we hear nothing in McCains interview statement at all which demonstrates that he couldnt recall. (It may be that he didnt want to discuss such tangential matters with Mike Allen, one of our most useless journalists.) And by the wayMcCains interview happened on Wednesday, not yesterday. That error is trivial, of courseunlike other mistakes in this piece. But the error reminds us of a fact which has been clear for a very long time: Chimps like Weisman can barely gargle without getting the simplest facts wrong.
Beyond that: Scribes like Weisman can barely gargle without repeating Approved Standard Narratives. In todays report, Weisman has virtually married a narrativeand another part of the new standard narrative gets recited a bit later on. Truly, what follows is gruesome. But as of today, its being pimped all over the mainstream press:
Lets give Weisman a little credit; in this passage, he correctly said that the Saddleback forum happened on Saturday. But in this passage, Weisman asserts, without qualification, that McCain made a peculiar statement about the threshold for being richfailing to note, as others have done, that the statement was made as a joke. In todays Post, even Gene Robinson made himself be semi-truthful:
Robinson couldnt quite make himself tell the truthbut even he felt required to say that McCain was just being flippant. But in Weismans prose, a joke becomes a straightforward assertion. And this brings us to a basic rule for those who would understand their press corps: If you want to know who the press corps is hunting, just see which candidates jokes they transform into straight assertions.
We know, we know! Some of us are such chimps ourselves that we want to believe that McCains wasnt joking. Olbermann, our sides uber-chimp, has been flinging this poo this whole week. (Along with so much more. Good God, that man is a chimp!) But at any rate, fairly or not, our longings are being rewarded this week: The press corps has widely acted as if McCains joke was a serious statement. Its as we told you long ago: This is not a campaign in which the press corps will be group-pimping the Republican candidate. And that represents a major change in recent political journalism.
We wont attempt to capture all the chimp-like work on display todayalthough if you like seeing poo flung about, well recommend Josh Marshalls efforts. (Or just go read Olbermanns transcripts.) Instead, well offer a few basic thoughts about the shape of this major change in the press corps conduct:
The power of ridicule: In mainstream press treatment of this story, McCain is being subjected to a type of ridicule which has only been aimed at major Democrats in the Clinton/Gore/Clinton era. (Dan Quayle was the last Big Republican treated this wayand that began in 1988.) This kind of group ridicule, if widely sustained, is very difficult for a candidate to address. Later, press spokesmen like Michelle Cottleour own eras Cokie-in-trainingwill announce that this just shows how ineptly the hopeful campaigned. Why couldnt he make us stop repeating those ludicrous statements?
The reason for the ridicule: As a general matter, the press corps aims this type of ridicule at hopefuls it hopes to defeat.
Previously disappeared: Many voters will be surprised to learn that McCain is very wealthy. Theyll be surprised for an obvious reason: This basic part of McCains biography was widely suppressed by the mainstream press in the past dozen years, when they were pimping his vast moral greatness and tearing down Major Dems. (Your liberal journals also stared into air. That seems to be why theyre there.) To state the obvious, McCains wealth should have been part of the story long ago; by normal standards, its a basic part of political bio. This hasnt been part of the public record because hacks and stoogeslets mention the gruesome Gene Robinson againburied this matter in the years when they were destroying Big Dems like Al Gore. (Who grew up in a fancy hotelat the Ritz!according to one of their scripted group lies.) Quite routinely, wealth has been used to slime Big Demseven wealth that didnt exist. For that reason, McCains real wealth had to be disappeared.
Why theyve flipped: As weve told you, major elements of the mainstream press have lost patience with the Endless War Culture. Other elements of the press genuinely favor Obama; almost surely, Chris Matthews wasnt kidding about that thrill up the leg. Under these stresses, the group nervous breakdown of the Clinton/Gore/Clinton era has, in many ways, run its course. And remember: These life-forms are thoroughly chimp-like. They react in one way to those they disfavorby flinging poo all around. It would be too much for them to discuss McCains errors, flips, contradictions.
In our view, it has been a bit embarrassing this weekwatching Obama campaign against McCains joke. In our view, you suspect a candidate has little to say when he campaigns in that fashion. But as the press corps starts pimping Obamas new narrative, you see the shape of an important new fact: Major elements of the mainstream press are, at long last, switching sides. It has been a very long time since they flung poo to the right.
McCain couldnt remember how many houses he owns! It isnt clear that this is accurate, and the narrative it serves is largely inane. But you live on a planet of chimps; its driven by people who just cant get serious. This morning, poo is being flung in a new direction. Your discourse got even dumber this week. And good lord! Some chimps have switched sides!
Spinning bio, Saint McCain style: Candidate bio was endlessly spun during McCains first run for the White House. His massive wealth was rarely mentioned; so too, journalists rarely discussed the seamier side of his conduct in the years when he divorced his first wife and married Cindy McCain. Understandably, voters thought the Keating Five was a jazz group McCain had once played inno doubt during the glory years, when hed chased all those stripper ex-girl friends around. And something else got disappeared: You almost never heard that McCain grew up as part of insider Washington, the same-name son of a father who was a powerful Washington political player. You almost never heard that hed gone to an elite Washington prep school. Theres nothing wrong with any of thatbut you didnt hear them for an obvious reason. You see, the press corps was using that particular poo to punish the deeply vile Candidate Gore. The fact that the very same script applied to McCain simply couldnt be mentioned.
POSTSCRIPTDUMBEST QUESTION: We decided to skip this topic at the start of the week. But now that McCains $5 million statement has become a key part of the discourse, lets go back and take a look at the dumbest question Rick Warren asked during the Saddleback summit.
Unsurprisingly, the chimps failed to notice. On Sundays This Week, E, J. Dionne emoted about Warrens vast brilliance. Who won the Battle of Saddleback? This was his odd reply:
Is the real Dionne in a holding cell, locked away with the real Josh Marshall? We thought Warrens performance was reasonably OK; he was completely polite to both candidates, and he seemed sincere. But why gush over someone who asked so many truly bad questions? Many of Warrens questions were badbut this question, as it was posed to Obama, was perhaps the worst of the evening:
Actually, thats a real simple minded questionone thats utterly foolish. Warren may have been sincere in asking, but it plays to a potent, pseudo-conservative framework: Democrats want to tax the richbut they cant even define it! Talk hosts constantly pimp this frameworkand many listeners think it makes sense. Warrens presentation was unique because, perhaps for the first time ever, the question was posed to a Republican as well as a Democrat. This pointless framework is normally reserved for use against Democrats only.
Duh. There is no number an intelligent person can cite which would sensibly define a person as rich. There is no cut-off point! Any such designation is arbitraryand this utterly empty exercise plays no role in the formulation of actual tax policy. Obama knows that, and McCain know it too. (Well guess that Warren, an amateur, doesnt.) But this is a dangerous framework for Dems. As soon as a Democrat answers this silly question, he is left open to a wide array of well-entrenched, familiar charges. Inevitably, this framework takes Dems into the realm of class warfare.
At any rate, heres how Obama responded to this pointless and dangerous framework. Like McCain, he told a joke. Its a way to be polite as you slip past a moderators nonsense:
Eventually, Obama discussed his actual tax proposalswhile stressing that nobody likes paying taxes. At first, though, he came perilously close to answering Warrens questionso close that some people later claimed, inaccurately, that hed said that youre rich if you make more than $250,000. Youll notice that he didnt say thatbut he came (a bit too) close. Please note: Obama didnt say he wanted to tax the rich. He said that somebody had to pay for our schools and our roads, and that he wanted to be fair about it.
Obama started with a joke, then sensibly moved to a discussion of his actual tax proposals. But there is no sensible way to answer Warrens actual question. Any designation is arbitraryand any number a pol might offer exposes him to pointless complaints. Most likely, McCain understood this basic fact too. What follows is his full Q-and-A. His answer includes the obvious joke which is now being treated as serious. This morning, Weismanan endless hackpretends McCains joke was a statement:
Warrens framing of the question was even dumber this time around. (Everybody talks about taxing the rich? No pol ever does, unless hes accusing opponents.) Like Obama, McCain slid away from Warrens request for a number, turning to a discussion of his actual tax proposals. And along the way, he told a joke, in which he said that rich would be an income of $5 million a year. After a very large laugh from the audienceits absurd to claim that this wasnt a jokehe then said: But seriously. And then, he made an accurate prediction: Im sure that comment will be distorted. Perhaps he knew the day when Weisman would clown and cavort.
Warren asked a very dumb question. No skillful pol would ever give a number in response to this query. (Other questions were quite bad too.) But the next morning, E. J. Dionne was praising Warren for his very brilliant questioning. And on Monday, Obama began campaigning hardagainst his opponents joke.
Campaigning that way can work quite wellif the chimps are on your side. This morning, Weismans poo-flinging news report signals a change in our journalism.
We are all Sean Hannity now: Good God. What a poo-king Olbermann is! We are all Sean Hannity now as we listen to his screeching and watch him presenting his back-side. Well give some examples on Monday.